MissTrixta

The path I chose...

misstrixta-life — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 11:59:00 -0500

So many years have passed since I saw you last…
I hardly remembered those deep and lonely eyes…
Like a shadow you disappeared when the night crept in..
When darkness engulfed me.
Long forgotten the memories became, but
When the sun rose
Scared was I to unlock what my heart locked so long ago.
Broken I felt, as i was lost in what is…
Too busy to face what was…
Not knowing what to do
when the morning light revealed you.
I closed my eyes hoping that you’d once again
disappear…
But through the my eyelids the image of the
Remembrance of pain associated with you is etched.
A burning reminder that I can’t escape…
So I must face you….
I’m not sure what it’s going to be…. But I must dig to know…
I’m not sure with this, where it’ll go… But I must follow…
Deep breathe… Step…. No…
Don’t fear… Just let my wall go…

Ghost of Who I Used to Be

misstrixta-life — Sat, 16 Mar 2013 01:01:00 -0500

Every night in the mirror I see, a ghost of who I used to be.

Filled with love and laughter that died long ago.

A reflection of bitterness, loneliness, and pain now appear before me.

Most days I float on by, running below the radar

With a fake smile on my face,

While deep inside wishing for rain

So that masked tears may fall.

Every night in the mirror I see, a ghost of who I used to be.

Filled with love and laughter that died long ago.

A reflection of bitterness, loneliness, and pain now appear before me.

Most days I escape through time.

Filling each minute, each hour with distractions,

While deep inside wishing for the darkness

That will mask the pain I wish to release.

Every night in the mirror I see, a ghost of who I used to be.

Filled with love and laughter that died long ago.

A reflection of bitterness, loneliness, and pain now appear before me.

Most days, I walk this winding road… looking to which direction I should go.

Getting more lost with each turn.

While deep inside wishing behind something I can hide…

So that the world cannot see

That every night in the mirror I see a ghost of who I used to be…

Filled with love and laughter that died long ago.

A reflection of bitterness, loneliness, and pain now appear before me.

A ghost forever lost in a sea of misery,

Waiting for a lighthouse to guide me to be once again…

Free.

Feb 6th- Thoughts

misstrixta-life — Wed, 06 Feb 2013 21:29:00 -0600

I’m sitting here listening to the music of my past and I reminisce about the past. I am realizing all of the things I took for granted in the past. Friends, family, faith. If it were not for these I would not be where I am today. So to the past… this is for you.

Step by step we walk through life

treading upon the words and desires of

of time that has long passed.

Some never looking back on the

foot prints we leave behind.

Step with step we grow and transcend from

what we once were to what we are to become

forgetting the foot prints that have led and will lead

us to those we are to become.

As the sands of time trickle down, and the final

grains fall… we will come to realize

that the foot prints we left behind

were never washed up by the waves of the future…

but rather fossilized and buried deep with in

who we are to be.

those foot prints long forgotten are

forever imprinted in our future.

and with that step by step into the future we go…

hand in hand with the foot prints of our past.

forever walking one in one.

Adler Planetarium

misstrixta-life — Sun, 08 Apr 2012 02:52:00 -0500

Adler Planetarium

Navy Pier Ferris Wheel

misstrixta-life — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 21:41:57 -0500

Navy Pier Ferris Wheel

Buckingham Fountain, Grant Park Chicago

misstrixta-life — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 21:36:00 -0500

Buckingham Fountain, Grant Park Chicago

Beauties beneath the sea at Shedd Aquarium

misstrixta-life — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 20:59:03 -0500

Beauties beneath the sea at Shedd Aquarium

Chicago Skyline

misstrixta-life — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 03:01:00 -0500

Chicago Skyline

epiphany

misstrixta-life — Sun, 19 Feb 2012 14:09:10 -0600

my life has not gone the way that I planned it to go. I’ve hit a really tough bump in my life, and I’m feeling lost. But over this weekend I realized I can’t let that get me down. I’ll get back on track some how, and eventually.

Aquatic show @ Shedd Aquarium

misstrixta-life — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 00:15:46 -0500

Aquatic show @ Shedd Aquarium

Love

misstrixta-life — Sun, 25 Sep 2011 22:45:00 -0500

Love is not all about giving, or all about taking.

It is a balance of giving and taking. It goes far beyond compromising. It stems from being able to empathize and understand.

Beautiful summer day in Chicago Shedd Aquarium, view from Adler...

misstrixta-life — Sun, 25 Sep 2011 22:37:40 -0500

Beautiful summer day in Chicago

Shedd Aquarium, view from Adler Planetarium

Marriage... A fusion of lives or a new life?

misstrixta-life — Sun, 11 Sep 2011 04:30:06 -0500

A dear friend of mine recently tied the knot. The pastor at their wedding ceremony spoke of a fusion of two lives, inseparable like lemon juice and water. This concept, though ideal, in many relationships doesn’t work. This concept allows you to take with you your selfish desires and needs and combine it with your partner’s life; therefore, not giving up anything.

I believe that marriage leads to a new life, of not two lives as one through a fusion, but two lives left behind to form new life. In order to have a marriage both parties need to be ablento set aside their selfish needs in order to want and need things that will satisfy a whole. Truly making you one. Because being “one” means, one life, one love, one desire, one ultimate goal, one heart, and one soul.

But this is only my opinion. What is yours?

Lost in thought

misstrixta-life — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 18:11:00 -0500

Lost in thought

Forever Missing You

misstrixta-life — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 18:08:00 -0500

Your smile and odd sense of humor
we can no longer see nor feel.

Your friendship, your voice
No longer a part of our lives.

We can pretend you are still here
among us, bringing light to our lives

We can try to replace, try to forget
but you are unforgettable, irreplaceable.

That day pain struck our hearts
knowing it is you… we can no longer see
it is you… we can no longer feel.

We grow old, as you can’t.
We move on, while you are forever you.
But we will never forget…

The light you brought and still bring
to our lives.

For we will forever miss you.

Simple pleasures of life…

misstrixta-life — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 16:07:36 -0500

Simple pleasures of life…

Simple childhood….

misstrixta-life — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 16:04:15 -0500

Simple childhood….

Photographs of a Dented Heart

misstrixta-life — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 15:27:00 -0500

A scrapbook lies before me,
filled with memories that have passed.
I sit here staring, wishing, wondering…
why…

As I gaze upon my wall,
pieced together by photographs,
a reflection of my past flashes before me…
I remember what I choose not to feel.

Piece by piece this wall,
these photographs, reveal fragments
of my broken life,
of my shattered heart,
of my shadowed dreams.

Vulnerable I remain.

It seems as if
every time I take one step forward
life takes me ten steps back;
and once again
I am stranded within my shadows.

It is said that love begins
with many kisses and softly spoken words,
but eventually it leads to an ocean of tears.

But why must it always be that way…
Why can’t love just be laughter and joy,
rather than sorrow and pain?

Many people step into our lives…
but are they like imprints within the
trodden snow?
Will they disappear and be left forgotten
when the warmth of the spring returns?

And here… from this moment…
I journey on…
Hoping to discover,
the true meaning of love…
Here I travel on, wandering aimlessly
searching for the glue that will
once again piece together pieces of
my fragmented life…
I begin…